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Apps that can help family organization after divorce

Divorcing Connecticut couples who have children will need to continue some type of relationship even after they've gone their separate ways. Handling the day-to-day organization of your children's activities is hard enough when you're together. When you live separately but want to remain involved in your children's lives, it can be even more complicated.

Fortunately, there are some good apps out there designed to help parents who aren't living together communicate about their children's activities and expenses. These can be particularly useful for divorced couples who have difficulty maintaining an amicable relationship, even when it comes to their children. However, they can also be useful organizational tools for parents who are committed to putting their differences aside to successfully co-parent their children.

What's special about the tenth anniversary for divorcing couples?

Many fans of actors Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner were saddened to hear their announcement just a day after their 10-year wedding anniversary that they are divorcing. According to legal and financial experts, the timing of that announcement was likely carefully calculated. What's significant about the 10-year anniversary for couples who divorce, and what can other couples learn from the way that "Bennifer" is untying the knot?

There can be significant financial advantages to waiting until the tenth anniversary to divorce. In California, where Affleck and Garner's divorce will take place, 10-plus year marriages are considered "long term." This can have advantages for the spouse who earns less because a judge can award him or her more spousal support and for a longer period of time than if the marriage hadn't lasted a decade.

Actress testifies of toll that custody battle has taken

Fortunately, most child custody battles don't get as complicated and drawn out as that of actress Kelly Rutherford and her ex-husband, Daniel Giersch. The two, who divorced in 2010, have been fighting an international battle for their now 6- and 8-year-old children.

Giersch, who was born in Germany, has not been allowed entry into the U.S. since a trip he made abroad several years ago. In 2013, a judge decided that the children would live with their father abroad.

Summer requires planning and communication for divorced parents

For many divorced parents, summer vacation means a change in child custody and visitations whether your plans include a getaway or not. It's generally a good idea to work out arrangements for summer break while you are drafting your custody agreement. This can help prevent confusion and disputes that can ruin your children's summer and make yours unpleasant as well.

Whatever you have in mind, it's essential to communicate your plans to your co-parent and get his or her OK before you make any reservations, particularly if your plans will cut into the other one's time. It's also important to get your kids' input. When parents break up, children often feel like they've lost all control over their world. Having a say in summer vacation plans can help them reclaim some of that.

What is a 'fair divorce?'

Divorce can be a highly-charged, emotional process. However, the decisions we make during our divorce may well impact us financially for the rest of our lives. An economist who acts as a financial advisor to people going through this process emphasizes the importance of getting a "fair divorce."

To many people, particularly those who weren't the ones to end the marriage, what seems fair may be taking everything your spouse ever had and ever will have. Obviously, that's not going to happen. However, there are objective ways to determine whether a divorce settlement is fair.

Chris Rock's wife seeks to maintain 'marital standard of living'

As many of our readers know, comedian Chris Rock filed for divorce from his wife, Malaak Compton-Rock, in December of last year. Now, Compton-Rock is seeking a settlement "commensurate with the marital standard of living," according to court documents.

The couple, who married in 1996 had a prenuptial agreement. However, that has since expired. The successful comedian/actor is said to be worth $70 million. The couple owns a home in the posh community of Alpine, New Jersey. Several years ago, it was called "America's Wealthiest Zip Code" by "Business Insider," with a median home price of $4.55 million.

A postnup can help protect stay-at-home parents in a divorce

While there aren't as many stay-at-home moms as when most of us were growing up, a number of women and men decide to be full-time parents while their spouses go off to work every day. While some of these stay-at-home parents have successful careers that they can pursue from home offices, most rely on their spouses to bring in most or all of the family income.

This puts them in a vulnerable financial position if the marriage ends in divorce. That's why a postnuptial agreement can be a good safeguard if you take time out of the workforce to raise your children, whether by choice or because of a job loss.

How to have a 'successful divorce'

The term "successful divorce" may seem like an oxymoron. However, more and more divorces are handled by mediation, collaboration and other types of out-of-court settlements that can help minimize rather than exacerbate the conflict between the soon-to-be ex-spouses. In fact, most divorces are not litigated in court.

No matter how amicable the proceedings, however, a successful divorce requires planning ahead, being prepared and not being afraid to fight for what you need. Here are some tips that can help you do that.

Looking for -- and finding -- the positive after a divorce

After a marriage has ended, it's common for people, at least in their darker moments, to feel like they've wasted some of the best years of their lives or that they've failed in some way. No matter how much friends and family may try to help you see the bright side, that can be hard to do.

Sometimes, making yourself write down all the good things that you got from that relationship can help you feel more positive. Sharing them can help others going through a divorce. Huffington Post readers and bloggers did that recently. Here are some of the positive things they out of their marriages:

How do you ask for a divorce?

Most people who've had a spouse ask them for a divorce can attest that it's a devastating experience. However, being the one to ask for a divorce can be extremely difficult as well. Every relationship is different, so there's no one way that's best for everyone. However, one couple who runs a divorce mediation firm and has counseled numerous couples through the divorce process has some suggestions for making the conversation as painless as possible.

-- Choose a time and place that's appropriate. You generally should be alone and uninterrupted by children or others. Allow enough time for a discussion. If your spouse has been going through a rough patch, such as losing a job, or if there are major events going on in the family, wait until things have settled down.-- Have something prepared to say. You may even want to role play with a therapist or someone else. This includes being aware of how your spouse is feeling. Does he or she know that there are problems or is this going to be a shock? Being prepared means being ready for whatever reaction your spouse may have. It could be anger, despair, resignation or any number of responses, both immediately and over time.If you're concerned for your safety, however, have a plan in place to exit the situation safely if necessary before you break the news. Your family law attorney can likely provide advice and resources.-- Don't use this conversation to start hashing out the details of property division, custody and support. There will be plenty of time for that with the help of your lawyer or mediator. If you start promising things to your spouse because you feel bad for hurting him or her, you may regret it.-- Be firm, but gentle. It's important for your spouse to understand that you've given this a great deal of thought and made up your mind. This is not the time to show anger, frustration or level blame. Focus on "I" rather than "you" statements.

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