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Hartford Family Law Blog

How Texans can make their divorce a new start

A divorce is often one of the worst curveballs life can throw us. Even if the break-up of a marriage is ultimately the best thing for the couple, it's still an event that forces us to reevaluate our life, goals and priorities. It also means starting over in a lot of ways. That can be good. You can't undo the past, but you can take steps to claim your future.

Take control of your finances. Likely, your financial situation has changed. Evaluate where you are and what steps you need to take to live within your means and still save for your future. If you have a good family law attorney, he or she is working to help you get the financial settlement you need. However, it's still important to be cautious until things are settled. If your spouse managed the money or if you had a tendency to overspend, now is the time to learn how to manage your money.

Judge authorizes use of Facebook to serve divorce papers

It seems as though we're doing increasingly more of our communication via social media. When one creative attorney tried without success to track down his client's elusive spouse to serve divorce papers, he turned to Facebook.

The unique way of serving the papers was approved by a supreme court justice in Manhattan in March. He wrote in his decision that "a concept should not be rejected simply because it is novel or non-traditional. This is especially so where technology and the law intersect."

Coach's wife reportedly 'blindsided' by divorce filing

The current basketball season isn't the only thing that's going badly for Derek Fisher. The former star player and current New York Knicks head coach filed for divorce last month from Candace.

The divorce filing came just a month after the couple's 10-year wedding anniversary. They have 8-year-old twins together. The couple had famously helped their daughter Tatum battle a rare eye cancer, retinoblastoma, when she was an infant. Even though Fisher was playing for the Utah Jazz at the time, Tatum underwent successful treatment at New York's Memorial Sloan Kettering. Last year, her mother reported that she is not only healthy and able to see, but "actually runs the household."

Take care of yourself during your divorce

Going through a divorce is probably one of the most stressful experiences a person can have. Many people, understandably, neglect their health during this time. However, falling into bad habits can have long-term ramifications. Middle-aged divorced women have been found to be more likely to have heart disease than those who are married.

Therefore, it's important to pay attention to your well-being. If you need friends, family or other support to do this, engage them to help you. Looking after your physical health can improve your emotional well-being.

Domestic violence and financial abuse often go hand-in-hand

According to the National Network to End Domestic Violence, financial or economic abuse is present in 98 percent of relationships where domestic violence occurs. Of course, women and men who aren't in physically abusive relationships can also be victims of financial abuse. Many of them don't even realize it until it is too late.

Sometimes, that realization comes when the marriage ends. The spouse (usually the woman) finds that she has no money or credit of her own. Meanwhile, her credit rating may have been decimated by her spouse's activities. In some of these relationships, the husband doesn't allow the wife to work or gets her fired by disrupting her workplace. Therefore, she has no immediate earning power of her own and difficulty finding employment.

Talking about child support and child custody at once

Child support and child custody are sometimes linked after a divorce in Connecticut. For example, if one parent has custody all of the time, the other parent may be asked to pay more in child support since that first parent has to give up time, effort and much else. This is seen as a way of balancing things out.

Of course, this also works the other way around. If a parent works hard to even things out as far as custody time is concerned, the amount of support required could go down. As a parent, you may want to take this relationship into account.

Why is planning for divorce significant in drafting a trust?

No one wants to plan for divorce. However, in some cases, it makes good financial sense. This is particularly true if a spouse has significant or even sentimental assets that he or she wants to protect if the marriage should end. That's why many people draw up prenuptial agreements and even postnuptial agreements. Another area where determining what will happen if you and your spouse go your separate ways is important is when drafting a trust.

Some married people draft their trusts to stipulate that their spouse will be removed as a beneficiary or trustee when a divorce filing is made. Others have the trust set up so that the spouse is not removed until the divorce is finalized. The difference can be significant.

Some things to prepare for as a divorced Connecticut parent

All conscientious Connecticut parents who divorce try to make the situation as painless as possible for their children. However, they are bound to experience some degree of sadness, confusion and stress.

Their relationship with both parents is likely to change, and parents will experience new challenges as they adjust to this new family dynamic. Whether you are the children's primary caregiver, you have 50/50 custody or you only see your children on weekends and holidays, there are some things you just need to expect and to learn how to deal with.

How gender may play a role in property division during divorce

Determining the division of property in a divorce can be one of the most time-consuming and potentially adversarial aspects of the process. This can hold true whether the divorce is mediated or goes to trial. Psychologists have found that what items and other assets matter most to the each of the two spouses involved, and even how they negotiate, can be impacted by their gender.

One study discussed something called the "endowment effect." This means that when people perceive that they own something, whether they legally do or not, they value it more. This tends to happen with physical objects like cars, furniture or other items in the house that they can touch.

Domestic violence charges can impact divorce, child custody cases

It is not uncommon for allegations of domestic violence to arise during a divorce or child custody battle. When someone accuses a spouse, ex-spouse or partner with domestic violence, law enforcement agencies and the courts usually err on the side of caution. This means issuing temporary restraining orders on the person accused of abuse to protect the other person in the relationship as well as the children.

An accusation of domestic violence can cause people to have to vacate their home, lose access to their children and even spend time in jail. If a restraining order is issued against a spouse, it can help the other one in future court proceedings.

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